Through Any Given Door – Part II After finishing my family memoir some years back, including the account of my sister Betty’s rape, I connected with Betty’s childhood friend, Lorna Harrington, who read it and then wrote me about their friendship. I combined two of... Continue
Rude Awakenings
For three years, my Sonoma Sun column consisted of chapters of my family memoir. I took a break from it a year ago as grim events were coming up: The deterioration of my mother; the kidnapping and rape of my 13-year-old sister; my oldest sister’s... Continue
We never make it to Nebraska. Instead, we head for Montana, as my brother thinks Montana is on the way home. Marian rolls her eyes, as she's been married to him for 50 years. I'm somewhat suspicious as to the whereabouts of Montana, but think... Continue
Marian always makes us two dozen Tollhouse cookies. Every trip I eat my half and half of Gordon's half. She eats almonds and prunes. Yakking away from too much sugar and chocolate, a “hell” or a “damn” falls out of my mouth and my brother... Continue
My brother Gordon, his wife Marian, and I had returned from our fifth road trip gathering family history. We had searched through county records, newspaper archives and historical museums, hunting for birth and death records, local articles, pictures, deeds, wills, and old maps – things... Continue
Why bother? They’re dead. Who cares about the past, and what difference does it make? But here’s the thing: sometimes we do something for its own sake, for the challenge, or just because. There was a five-year period from when I finished writing a memoir... Continue
A CALLING ~ What calls us to find the ancestors? It goes beyond a simple curiosity. We are compelled, possessed by something bigger than us that is begging to be revealed. There's one in most every family called to be the scribe, and I am... Continue
Look, I rode a donkey up the cliffs of Crete, waterskied down the Colorado River, and hiked the Cinque Terra. I trekked through the Mayan jungle and climbed Tikal. I hiked the pine forest above Rio Caliente, scaled Nevada Falls, and climbed rickety ladders to... Continue
Rumi (13th-century Persian poet and mystic) Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and right-doing, there is a field. I will meet you there. Pema Chodron (1936 – American-born Tibetan Buddhist teacher) Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know. If... Continue
I sent a reader down a rabbit hole regarding my use of "retarded." I was schooled to use a word that doesn't insult people with disability, demean them and pain those who love them. She reproached me to do the decent thing (as if I'd... Continue